Advice to my younger self

Meaningful relationships, self-awareness, and the outlook

I recently completed my 10th work anniversary at PwC. As I look back at my career in consulting, there are a few things I wish I would have done differently. Today, I am sharing the top 3 pieces of advice I would have given to my younger self.

Relationships

Advice#1: Build diverse and meaningful relationships - intentionally

Why so? During my early days at PwC, I focused on strengthening my core consulting skills and developing breadth and depth for the subject matter. While I was great at client relationships, I did not care much about making relationships across the firm. Back then, we did not have a career progression framework to guide the development focus areas either. This did not impede my progress immediately but it stunted my growth at some point.

During a major reorg a few years ago, I was on parental leave. When I came back, I learned that a few of the Partners I worked with were aligned to different verticals, while the others either left the firm or went on to pursue Global roles. All in all, I lost 90% of my relationship capital. It felt awful to lose the relationships, mentors, sponsors, and advocates like that. I had to start from the beginning — work very hard to prove myself, self-advocate, and find value alignment with the leaders I wanted to work with. It took me a few years to build my network back up again. But, this time I was intentional in reaching out to leaders outside of my immediate engagement, across sectors, and competencies. The result? My relationship map looks healthy and immune to reorgs or changes in leadership.

Authentic Leadership

Advice #2: Cultivate self-awareness early-on

Why so? Authenticity stems from developing a deeper understanding of self. Knowing who you are — your values, emotions, and competencies and how you’re perceived by others — is what self-awareness is all about. It helps one’s growth as a professional, but it also enables one to be effective in all spheres of life.

The only catch is that developing self-awareness is really hard work. It takes a lot of time and energy to understand your value system, what energizes you and ticks you, what you stand for, what is your craft, what are the causes that interest you, what is your purpose in life, and how others see you.

But once you have this down, you will show up authentically. You will discover your voice. Your perspectives will reflect the unique person that you are. You will stand on your own. You will lead with influence. And people around you will notice that. They will even walk up to you to tell you so. Yes, that has happened to me!

Over the last 2 years, I have spent hours reading up on this subject and doing multiple self-awareness and self-regulation exercises. I only wish that I would have done that sooner.

Career Outlook

Advice#3: Do not compare your trajectory with that of others

Why so? I have had a non-linear career journey. And I often fall into a comparison trap, thinking my progress has been slow as compared to some of my peers and seniors, who started their careers in consulting. And in that moment, I am suddenly filled with self-doubt and negativity.

Lately, I have been able to check those thoughts and feelings before they cloud me. I remind myself that I bring a unique combination of skills to the table — thanks to my prior experiences in big tech and engineering. I also look back to see where I actually started and how far I have come. Lastly, I also make sure to look at my achievements holistically - within and outside of my work life.

Comparison is a fundamental human impulse, there’s no way of shutting it down completely [3]. But now that I understand its origins, and what to watch out for, I can mitigate the negative effects and amplify the good. I would like to tell my younger self — whatever you will be tomorrow, it’s because of all that’s happening today, not in spite of it.

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References:

[1] https://hbr.org/2018/01/what-self-awareness-really-is-and-how-to-cultivate-it

[2]https://www.fosslien.com/liz-fosslien-you-cant-perfectly-plan

[3] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap